I got to spend some time with my friend this week. It feels like an eternity where we actually spent quality time together. Sure, occasionally I will go over to her house or we will go into the next town for shopping or something like that but this is the first time in a long time where I felt like we could actually talk. Because of the distance that has come between us in the last few months, I did not open up about everything going on in my life. I did not talk about how I am wanting to leave teaching or the last time I cut. She briefly asked about whether my medications were working and whether I was still going to counseling. I did admit that I had quit taking my OCD medication. She was quick like always to voice her opinion but I am not going to be controlled anymore. Besides, I had just recently withdrawn from the medication so I was not going to go back on it and endure that torture again.
We had a three-hour car ride both ways though plus we spent the night at a hotel and were together all day at the conference. So I have gotten in some quality time with her and that is exactly what I have been yearning for since school began. And while I am still close to my phone, wishing that she would call me to make my weekend a little better, I think I will be all right this weekend even if it means being all alone.