I haven’t been feeling very well the last several days. I have been really depressed and have not accomplished much of anything. My chair has become my base and all the chores have been neglected.
I have cried quite a few tears too. I hate my life. I hate my job and I see nothing positive about my life. I have no friends and nothing to really live for except for my cats.
On the plus side, I have not cut at all during this rough time. I certainly have wanted to but I want to earn my 30-day chip at the recovery meeting in two weeks and cutting is not going to get me that chip.
Instead, one day I drew butterflies on my wrist. It is part of the butterfly project. You draw butterflies instead of cutting and then you name them. If they naturally wash off, then the butterfly lives. Shannon and Libby have washed off and survived and Judy is still slightly there.